Ideas Not Process

I have been spending a lot of my blog detailing my process, and really not a great deal of time around the idea.  I guess I feel like I don't want to reveal my ideas until they are complete.  Nothing worse than a stolen idea.  The other reason is because process is very important to me.  The process is really part of the idea.  It grows and changes based on how my idea plans out.  Sometimes, the process makes the idea, and sometimes the idea changes mid-process and changes the process.

Since leaving my first Residency in June I have been struggling with the idea of "freedom is an illusion".  This idea has evolved to perception is reality.  An idea I think is less vague and easier to grapple with at the moment.  It also speaks more to how I want to work.

Soldiers and sailors are meant to be all the same.  We are trained to look and act in a certain fashion, and when we do we are rewarded.  We receive medals and ribbons congratulating our similitude, but in reality, after bootcamp, we are all individuals once again.  Everyone I know, while in service, disregards these "awards" and wear them out of requirement.  We do not appreciate them really until we separate from service and truly become "individuals" again.  I want to show this individuality in an organization that forces conformity.   I'm currently working to create this in a series of paintings of individuals.  Each painting will be named for the individual, but they will all be the same in many ways.

I am working with bowls because they signify a vessel.  Something to hold things with no end point because it is a circle, and no real way for separation once inside the bowl.  The military is a giant vessel, and once you are in it there is no end.  It pulls people in, comforts them, supports them, and holds onto them as long as possible.  The "vessel" has shaped me as a person and affected my entire life, and will continue to affect me until the day I die.  I do not feel I am the only one to feel this way.

There are parts of my process that are ready-made items.  I have give these items great thought, and eventually decided I needed something "pure", manufactured, and industriously similar.  Most of the items I am creating in ceramics, wax, enamel, and even maybe edible candies are hand made.  I'm working in hand made techniques for dissimilarity and individuality.  The objects have blemishes, and a child-like quality that I feel realistically identify the people that comprise our military population.  Adults, fitting in, but individuals that are rough around the edges, with child-like qualities that keep them young and intriguing.

So these are my ideas.  They are deeper than can be explained in a blog, and personal.  These works are something I'm excited to be engaged in.  They have a long way to go, and I'm looking forward to the time I will spend with them.

Progress and Headaches

Since my last post I have cleaned all the greenware and rebuilt my bowl.  I was not intending to rebuild my bowl, but I had frosted it with slip like a cake which made it extremely wet.  This soggy condition caused it to stick to my batt.  No problem, I should be able to just cut it off with my wire tool, but my stupid arm jerked as I was cutting it off and I cut half the bowl bottom off.  It required reconstructing in a very delicate manner that took me about 3 hours.

I'm meeting with my mentor on Thursday so I wanted to make sure my fragile items were at least in the bisque phase.  They are super thin and small and I think trying to drive all the way to Seattle with them will just cause too much damage.  I went to fire up my kiln to find that the new house did not have a 220 with a 50A draw.  It only had a 30A.  So I had to call an electrician for rewiring.  The kiln has been fired.  Now I'm just waiting for it to cool so I can see what damage was done on the inside.  Hopefully, none. 

I've constructed my purchased stretcher bars, stretched and gesso'ed the canvas, measured and drew the devises, painted my warm white on two of the canvases and applied my underpainting to one of them.  I'm a little disconcerted with the results thus far, but I have been thinking on the matter of preciseness and I've come to some conclusions as an artist and person:

1.  The Navy trained me to be clean, organized and precise but it is not in my nature.  I'm generally somewhat sloppy in everything I try to tackle.

2.  I believe conclusion 1. can work in the favor of my work.  My work is a commentary on perception, and attempting precise without achieving precise nails the Navy right on the head in my mind.

3.  I have to work within the limitations of my physical condition.  Shakes, jolts, brain fogs and pain are part of my regular routine, and beating myself up over things I have no control over will not complete anything or get me anywhere.

Thursday after my visit with my mentor I will be visiting Seattle Galleries and attending an opening.  I will be posting again with updated product pictures and pictures from the galleries.

Ceramic Ribbons and Such

I found a temporary way around my camera.  My phone!

Here are some images of my progress with my candy dish:

I'm not sure yet if I feel this dish is too deep.  I may remake this all together.  Maybe more squat and open?  I really want the viewer to have to reach in and have it feel somewhat endless.

The images on the right are the ceramic ribbons and medals I have been working on.  I have applied some underglaze for color, but I accidently purchased a bisque underglaze in the rest of the colors so I will have to fire these once before I can finish painting them.  The medals I started with a mold made from gel flex but I found making impressions with the actual medal seemed to work better.  They still need to dry and be cleaned up prior to firing. 

The plan with these items are for pedestal "decoration".  They are going to be basically in a pile under the dish.  Why not use real ribbons and medals?  Two reasons.  One I want them to feel individualized and rough, which is something the hand building brings about.  I also want the actual item to seem somewhat unobtainable.  The ceramic allows me to add a clear coat of glaze so everything will have a glassy, shiny and new look ( I hope). 

After starting the pedestal I am thinking I may have to make a lot more medals and ribbons for my idea to be fully realized.  I'm going to start with these and see what happens.  I don't want the pedestal to be giant but I don't want the bowl to dwarf it either.

Lastly, I am working out a few different painting ideas.  The stretcher bars did not show today as they were supposed to.  I'm starting to get frustrated.  I should have just built them myself.  It would have take the same amount of time!  Anyway, The faces on the bottom are ideas for larger paintings but maybe they are too personal.  The top left is something I'm ready to start painting but I'm waiting for those dang bars!!  I've been doing a great deal of thinking and writing and thinking and writing so I am really itching to get started on these.

Moving Obstacle

Currently, I cannot find the data cable to transfer all the lovely progress pictures onto my laptop.  Therefore, there will be no pictures until I can buy a replacement cable or I find the one I lost in the move.

Otherwise, my work is coming together slowly.  I am building a ceramic pedestal and bowl for my first piece.  I have decided on hand building to give the ribbons and medals an individuality a mold would not allow.  I'm not the best at pottery because I've only taken two classes so things are moving along super slow (at least slower than when I paint).  I have my 12in stretcher bars on order and they should be here today.  I plan on alternating between painting and building ceramics once the bars arrive.  I've been collecting ribbons to prepare for the massive project ahead of me and I have my own little archive going.  I wish I could find that cable for my camera!!

Anyway, I meet with my mentor next week and hopefully I will continue happily in this direction.  I also want to do some filming, but I want to get the full use of my ribbons before I destroy them.  Plus, I have to make the bowls for the film first.  Lots to do!