My Artist Statement

Below is my artist statement for this semester. I've thought long and hard about this and I'm ready for the upcoming residency in January.

Artist Statement

The military trained me to look and act in a certain fashion, and compliance brought me rewards. Time spent in the service has had a lasting effect on me and I want my art to communicate this experience and my perception of the military. My experience in the Navy has created a great sense of pride, but also bitterness towards military requirements stifling my individuality through subservience. I translate the pride and enjoyment found in the structured military lifestyle, but at the same time I juggle with the bitterness and resentment I feel towards the military by employing fragile and inedible mediums and exaggerated, misleading color palettes. I emphasize the idea of the individual and the cherished medals and ribbons through the deliberately introduced imperfections.

My paintings, sculptures, installations and photographs have similarities through size, color and repetition. I create a commentary on the removal of an individual’s identity by incorporating mass-produced readymade items. The conclusion of military service returns the individual’s identity, and I represent this in my work through rugged hand-made objects. My paintings, ceramics, wax and enamel allude to the notion of non-conformity within the military system through blemishes and a child-like quality that realistically identifies the people in our military. By focusing on symbology through small military accessories, I experiment with the playful and memorable moments during one’s time in service.

Flags

I've been wrapping up a few projects that I have yet to show on my blog. They both revolve around the American Flag.

 The first idea continues the use of homemade inedible insignia candy individually wrapped. They are piled in the center of an American flag which is cleanly laid out on the floor. The act of laying the flag on the floor is a form or resentment in my work because it is such a dishonor to our flag, and on the other hand it is used as a blanket or table cloth to keep the candies clean and free from the floor.

The second idea deals with images I collected from other military members. The images are of different ways each person stores their medals and ribbons when not in use or after service is complete. They are Photoshopped and altered to emphasize the ribbons. They are then lined up as an archive would be and generically labeled. I am also working on a project that contains a miniature flag hung from the ceiling with these photos hung evenly on each side. The ribbons have been cut out of the images to emphasize the idea that our flag and country leaves a lasting memory in service members through their routine achievements in the military.

Jeffrey Mitchell Exhibit

My house had a break down while I was away on Halloween night.  Now I am trying to deal with the damage repairs and a cold/allergies (not sure which it is).  I'm wrapping up my work by the end of November so it has time to dry and cure prior to shipping so at this point most of what I am working on will be wrapping up ideas from this residency and working up new ideas for the second residency.

Last Tuesday I met with my mentor.  I surfaced from the session with a new determination.  She recommended I visit the new exhibit at the Henri; Like a Valentine: The Art of Jeffrey Mitchell and think about it in relation to my work.  When I first arrived I did not quite understand why she wanted me to see his work.  It took some walking around to glean what ideas his work was inspiring and steering me towards.

Jeffrey Mitchell is a ceramist.  His work is based on sex, love, death and spirituality.  He creates these crazy sculptures, pickle jars and whimsical animals that at first seem innocent, but upon further inspection are comments based on his personal experiences.

  

The longer I spent with the pieces the more I picked up on the social cues being projected.  This is what my work is missing in some areas.  Specifically my candy dish idea and my photo project.  I have decided to go two different ways with my candy dish due to Mitchell's work.  My work with enamel, wax and ceramic insignia can be used in a different expressive piece.  They are objects given out in abundance.  My photo project has developed into an installation piece that represents the patriotism imbued in each ribbon a military member collects.  

Right now my concentration is short, but my determination is great.  Just working on being prepared for January at this point.

 

Cigar Boxes and Excitement

Today I completed three of my many pieces in progress.  I am working with the idea of ribbon and medals as "treasures" and "momentos".  A lot of keep sakes are placed on display in homes, and a lot are stored very commonly in cigar boxes.  I think the use of cigar boxes always makes me think of grandparents and past generations.  Of course, the only person I remember ever smoking cigars in my family was my Great Uncle Ange.  He loved cigars so much he was buried with them.  As a little girl I had a cigar box at my grandparents house that stored little toys and childhood keep sakes.  I guess that is something I feel and remember when I see these boxes.  I think this is a common experience for American's, which I think helps make the entire piece relate-able.

From left to right:  National Defense Ribbon, Navy Commendation, Good Conduct and Sea Service

This box works really wonderfully with the National Defense Ribbon.
As the "Autumn Collection" it feels somewhat fake and mass produced to me.

Taking the time to study the works of Haacke and Kippenberger helped a great deal with the creation of these pieces.  I was struggling with the idea of using ready made objects, but I don't think these pieces would work as well without them.  I'm very pleased with the way the ceramic pieces turned out in the end, and hopefully my mentor and advisor will feel the same.  Aside from these pieces I'm still plugging away on my candy bowls and paintings.

Labor of Love

This is my first time painting SO SMALL.  It is really a challenge for me, but I'm trying to do the best I can.  I finished the first of what is to be a long series of ribbon paintings.  It took me 12 hours total (not including drying time between coats) which will be hard to believe seeing as the piece is only 12x12 and has detail in only one area...a labor of love indeed.

A close up of what is considered a "finished" product.  After it dries I may go back in and fix.

The full piece with hospital corner folds in the canvas.

 These three are a few of the other paintings I have in progress.  These each have two coats currently.  A burnt umber under painting and a wash of colors.  I currently have 5 in progress, but somehow I missed photographing 2 of them.  I guess I got caught up in the moment.

 As the pieces near completion they will have individual touches that will make each unique. I haven't decided if I am happy with how they are unfolding, but this could be a good thing since the Navy did not unfold the way I thought it would either.  Somewhat a happy accident.

These ribbons were discarded at a thrift store.  They are dirty and torn and are completely unusable for uniforms. I am painting these with the material in the position it was in when I purchased the items because I think it adds to the unique quality.  It shows the rough handling they went through, and how the material has shifted and changed over time.

Above are more enamel insignia or "candies".  This time the enamel worked out a bit better because I mixed some wax into it.  It is less brittle but still has a somewhat yummy hard candy look to it.  I have decided to do a bowl of ceramic candies, a bowl of wax candies, and a bowl of enamel candies.  Each bowl will have a different glaze pattern with the same idea of the red white and blue of our flag patterned on the outside.  The inside of each bowl will be white to signify the innocence, ignorance, safety, comfort, and simplicity. 

I am also working on a momento piece from ceramic medals and ribbons and photographs. I forgot to take pictures so they will be in the next post.

Birthday and Grad Work

So today is my birthday.  As a present to myself I decided to work 40 hours last week in my studio so I could fly home to Michigan to see my family.  It has been over a years since I have been home, and the visit has been a nice break, while at the same time allowing me to see art from an east coast perspective. 

On Wednesday I took a visit to the Detroit Institute of Art.  I am a big fan of this museum because they generally put on an impressive contemporary art display.  Some big hitters I had the pleasure of viewing were Newman, Oldenburg, Yoko Ono, Shakisah Sikander, Judd, Moore, Lewitt, Artswager, Segal, Bouguereau, Gentileschi, Giacometti, Rothko, Picasso, Manet, Monet, Henri...the list goes on and on.  I enjoy museums because you can get right up close and experience the brush strokes and imperfections.  It also affords me the opportunity to see the artists I have been studying side by side. 

Going with my mother, grandmother and aunt also provided me a vehicle to practice the knowledge I've been acquiring through study.  It gave me insight into areas I could use more study, and areas where retention has been fairly consistent.  It also makes me see how people can say there are no more original ideas in art.  There is so much to be influenced and inspired by today that it would be a shame not to use other artists as inspiration.

Plugging Along

 I started wrapping my "candies" this week.  It took me 5 hours to wrap what you see on the left.  FML!  I have wrappers in red and blue as well.  I have 3 giant bowls and I intend to do a different type of candy for each bowl.  I at least want one done before the residency in January.

 These are the ceramic medals and ribbons I have been working on.  I've decided to make them a project of their own.  Something that will showcase the precious nature.  I want the individual ruggedness to be extremely noticeable, because I'm working with the idea that although these pieces are mass produced they are important, yet disposable, to those that receive them. 




The medal impressions hint at the "backwards" nature of it all.

 These last two pieces are progress on my Individuals series.  The top I have completed two layers, and the bottom is just the under painting.  I have been working on constructing frames, stretching and gessoing canvas, and painting whites this week.

Ideas Not Process

I have been spending a lot of my blog detailing my process, and really not a great deal of time around the idea.  I guess I feel like I don't want to reveal my ideas until they are complete.  Nothing worse than a stolen idea.  The other reason is because process is very important to me.  The process is really part of the idea.  It grows and changes based on how my idea plans out.  Sometimes, the process makes the idea, and sometimes the idea changes mid-process and changes the process.

Since leaving my first Residency in June I have been struggling with the idea of "freedom is an illusion".  This idea has evolved to perception is reality.  An idea I think is less vague and easier to grapple with at the moment.  It also speaks more to how I want to work.

Soldiers and sailors are meant to be all the same.  We are trained to look and act in a certain fashion, and when we do we are rewarded.  We receive medals and ribbons congratulating our similitude, but in reality, after bootcamp, we are all individuals once again.  Everyone I know, while in service, disregards these "awards" and wear them out of requirement.  We do not appreciate them really until we separate from service and truly become "individuals" again.  I want to show this individuality in an organization that forces conformity.   I'm currently working to create this in a series of paintings of individuals.  Each painting will be named for the individual, but they will all be the same in many ways.

I am working with bowls because they signify a vessel.  Something to hold things with no end point because it is a circle, and no real way for separation once inside the bowl.  The military is a giant vessel, and once you are in it there is no end.  It pulls people in, comforts them, supports them, and holds onto them as long as possible.  The "vessel" has shaped me as a person and affected my entire life, and will continue to affect me until the day I die.  I do not feel I am the only one to feel this way.

There are parts of my process that are ready-made items.  I have give these items great thought, and eventually decided I needed something "pure", manufactured, and industriously similar.  Most of the items I am creating in ceramics, wax, enamel, and even maybe edible candies are hand made.  I'm working in hand made techniques for dissimilarity and individuality.  The objects have blemishes, and a child-like quality that I feel realistically identify the people that comprise our military population.  Adults, fitting in, but individuals that are rough around the edges, with child-like qualities that keep them young and intriguing.

So these are my ideas.  They are deeper than can be explained in a blog, and personal.  These works are something I'm excited to be engaged in.  They have a long way to go, and I'm looking forward to the time I will spend with them.

Progress and Headaches

Since my last post I have cleaned all the greenware and rebuilt my bowl.  I was not intending to rebuild my bowl, but I had frosted it with slip like a cake which made it extremely wet.  This soggy condition caused it to stick to my batt.  No problem, I should be able to just cut it off with my wire tool, but my stupid arm jerked as I was cutting it off and I cut half the bowl bottom off.  It required reconstructing in a very delicate manner that took me about 3 hours.

I'm meeting with my mentor on Thursday so I wanted to make sure my fragile items were at least in the bisque phase.  They are super thin and small and I think trying to drive all the way to Seattle with them will just cause too much damage.  I went to fire up my kiln to find that the new house did not have a 220 with a 50A draw.  It only had a 30A.  So I had to call an electrician for rewiring.  The kiln has been fired.  Now I'm just waiting for it to cool so I can see what damage was done on the inside.  Hopefully, none. 

I've constructed my purchased stretcher bars, stretched and gesso'ed the canvas, measured and drew the devises, painted my warm white on two of the canvases and applied my underpainting to one of them.  I'm a little disconcerted with the results thus far, but I have been thinking on the matter of preciseness and I've come to some conclusions as an artist and person:

1.  The Navy trained me to be clean, organized and precise but it is not in my nature.  I'm generally somewhat sloppy in everything I try to tackle.

2.  I believe conclusion 1. can work in the favor of my work.  My work is a commentary on perception, and attempting precise without achieving precise nails the Navy right on the head in my mind.

3.  I have to work within the limitations of my physical condition.  Shakes, jolts, brain fogs and pain are part of my regular routine, and beating myself up over things I have no control over will not complete anything or get me anywhere.

Thursday after my visit with my mentor I will be visiting Seattle Galleries and attending an opening.  I will be posting again with updated product pictures and pictures from the galleries.

Ceramic Ribbons and Such

I found a temporary way around my camera.  My phone!

Here are some images of my progress with my candy dish:

I'm not sure yet if I feel this dish is too deep.  I may remake this all together.  Maybe more squat and open?  I really want the viewer to have to reach in and have it feel somewhat endless.

The images on the right are the ceramic ribbons and medals I have been working on.  I have applied some underglaze for color, but I accidently purchased a bisque underglaze in the rest of the colors so I will have to fire these once before I can finish painting them.  The medals I started with a mold made from gel flex but I found making impressions with the actual medal seemed to work better.  They still need to dry and be cleaned up prior to firing. 

The plan with these items are for pedestal "decoration".  They are going to be basically in a pile under the dish.  Why not use real ribbons and medals?  Two reasons.  One I want them to feel individualized and rough, which is something the hand building brings about.  I also want the actual item to seem somewhat unobtainable.  The ceramic allows me to add a clear coat of glaze so everything will have a glassy, shiny and new look ( I hope). 

After starting the pedestal I am thinking I may have to make a lot more medals and ribbons for my idea to be fully realized.  I'm going to start with these and see what happens.  I don't want the pedestal to be giant but I don't want the bowl to dwarf it either.

Lastly, I am working out a few different painting ideas.  The stretcher bars did not show today as they were supposed to.  I'm starting to get frustrated.  I should have just built them myself.  It would have take the same amount of time!  Anyway, The faces on the bottom are ideas for larger paintings but maybe they are too personal.  The top left is something I'm ready to start painting but I'm waiting for those dang bars!!  I've been doing a great deal of thinking and writing and thinking and writing so I am really itching to get started on these.

Moving Obstacle

Currently, I cannot find the data cable to transfer all the lovely progress pictures onto my laptop.  Therefore, there will be no pictures until I can buy a replacement cable or I find the one I lost in the move.

Otherwise, my work is coming together slowly.  I am building a ceramic pedestal and bowl for my first piece.  I have decided on hand building to give the ribbons and medals an individuality a mold would not allow.  I'm not the best at pottery because I've only taken two classes so things are moving along super slow (at least slower than when I paint).  I have my 12in stretcher bars on order and they should be here today.  I plan on alternating between painting and building ceramics once the bars arrive.  I've been collecting ribbons to prepare for the massive project ahead of me and I have my own little archive going.  I wish I could find that cable for my camera!!

Anyway, I meet with my mentor next week and hopefully I will continue happily in this direction.  I also want to do some filming, but I want to get the full use of my ribbons before I destroy them.  Plus, I have to make the bowls for the film first.  Lots to do!

The Slow Uphill Battle

I've been struggling with my process lately.  When I paint in my usual large format I can knock out a painting in 6 hours or less.  With this new idea I'm working to mind every little detail.  I'm working to make my idea precious and personal without revealing.  It's a very frustrating process for me because I like to see results.  I'm a 30 minute meal maker, crochet instead of knit, machine over hand type of girl.  I like to see it happen right now, but this kind of work demands attention to detail and process.

With that said, I am sketching more than usual on the process.  Building, tearing down, forming with new mediums, and waking in the middle of the night with a new amazing addition have all become regularities in my life.  I'm measuring and remeasuring.  Thinking about inches and perfection.  Math and perfection are not strong points for me, but it is so important right now I'm trying to take my time. 

Wednesday I will post pictures of this process.

Working Out A New Idea

Since meeting with my mentor I have stopped  working with the fish and bird ideas.  I have moved onto an idea she and I equally felt was more conceptual.  I will still attempt to work with the idea of "freedom is an illusion", but it is a very broad concept that may require a great deal more thinking before it will be ready to attempt again.

These pieces are a start to my concept of the "sugar coated Navy perception".  It's more of my own commentary on the military. 

Clay insignia from a mold

In an earlier post I went through the new process (for me) of making the mold for these little buggers.  I have since experimented with enamel, wax and clay.  My mentor and I also discussed the use of glycerin and real candy substance.  Below are a few preliminary sketches and writings.  I am taking this week off due to company visiting for the week.  Next week I will have lots more to post since I will be putting 40 hours into my studio to catch up. 

This idea deals with different kinds of homemade clay bowls as well.  I have taken pottery classes, but my skills on the wheel are very limited.  This entire project will be very taxing on my abilities.

The second idea touches back to my painting roots.  Using the ribbons and medals I have collected from the base thrift shop I will be making a series of small very detailed paintings.  I will discuss further as the idea develops.  I still have to decide the size I want to work in and color choices.

New space and work

Well, we are moving to a bigger house.  Here are pictures of my new spacious studio space.  I love it!  It's like a dream come true...if a little low in the ceiling.

I had to take the caster wheels off my easel and it is still a little too tall.  I guess I will have to chop the top down.

Today I worked on the salmon painting I've been working on, and started a new one.  Below is an image in the beginning stages.  The other painting will be updated in it's original post.

I'm experimenting with the play of gravity or lack there of in my paintings.  Something to add a strangeness or maybe just a bit of discomfort for the viewer.

I have added another layer of color to this piece.  I also added some more palette knife work.  At this point I took it to my mentor for the first time, and I probably will stop working on this piece for now.

The two pieces side by side

Sketchbook

I thought it might be worthwhile to include some of my sketchbook pages I've been working on.  These pages are images I found interesting pertaining to my paintings as source material, drawings, thumbnail sketches of composition and writings.  

Some of these ideas I will try, and some of them I put on paper just to get it out of my head.  

Fish idea:

Swallow idea:

Progress on my progress

Here is the finished product.  Everyone who has seen it that is not an artist, art historian, or art critic has loved it.  Everyone that is otherwise feels it is to literal and leading.  Therefore, the other piece I have started in this series will be set aside until Grad school is complete.

My mentor felt the fish pose was too much of a common sport fish pose.  She also felt the hands reaching in were too hulk like and menacing.  Her suggestion was to just make it a common angler painting with trees and such.  I may just do that some day.

I began adding color today.  I'm going to work the hands just a little more before letting the piece dry again.  The last stage I think will be going back in with the palette knives.  I'm thinking the only areas that will not be excessively affected by the blue tones will be the salmon.  I feel this piece is coming along nicely, and if it goes as planned I can see many more in this technique.  

Today I spent some time at the library, and since last night I have been mulling over what makes an image symbolic, a symbol, or just an image.  What do I need to do to make my paintings personal but not private.  I began thinking of the private things I attribute to freedom, and the things that make me feel encroached upon.

New idea drawn in.

For private reasons I have chosen the spawning salmon.  I think, at the same time, the salmon touches many people in different ways.  Especially in the Pacific Northwest.  In mythology the salmon represented wisdom and truth as well.  This particular salmon is a red salmon.  I will also be working with the King, Chum, Pink, and the Steelhead trout/salmon.  I'm not ready to give up the play of the figurative element, but I am trying to simplify.  This is the mockup drawing you see to the left.

I like that I initially started throwing paint on with my palette knife, but stopped, let it dry, and marinated on the piece for about a week prior to jumping in.  This is not my normal mode of painting.  Usually I have an idea and I see it through in as few sittings as possible.  I'm attempting a more personal relationship with this piece.

Beginning to fill in the background colors

The hands in this piece are going to be a study in distortion.  I want the hands to be slightly abstracted, but still be recognizable.  I need to find the fine line between bad drawing and where the hands aesthetically distort.

The only portion of this painting that will be worked into fine detail at this time is the salmon.  As the painting takes shape I may need to redirect and maybe even reposition things, but I believe this is a good jumping off point from the Japanese koi I was working in my previous series.

So this is one idea in my experimentation.  I am still working with military perception through sculpture and mixed media methods.  I have completely set aside film and I am happy with my decision. (sorry Sunanda!)



 UPDATE ON THE PROGRESS

 So, instead of posting many new posts I am going to add to this post until the project is complete.  That way all the pictures stay together.  Today I blocked in more color throughout the piece.  I think once I get the next layer on and the final detail in it will be very nice. 

The colors added are going to be undertones.  Ultimately, the entire piece will be completed with the palette knives with the exception of the Salmon which will be more smoothly rendered to hopefully add a jarring element.

Fail Boating or Success?!

Today and the last couple days for that matter have been trying.  I have recently decided to give up on making a film.  I'm not enjoying it so I think it is perfectly OK to stop.  Since I have stopped I have started to feel less depressed, and I have motivation to start other scary things.  Today I made my very first mold.  EVER!  Here is the chronicle of my fail boat.

Below is the disaster of my first pour.  Before I got to this point I had a bit of a mold meltdown.  I was initially just going to use the wooden box and punch the military pins through some cardboard.  Well, the cardboard got stuck in the box, and I had to cut it out.  Then, being the lazy person I am, I decided to reuse the mutilated perfectly shaped cardboard so I coated it in clear tape, reattached my pins and placed it in the box.  Then I read the directions...

Once I read the directions I realized I couldn't use clear tape and I had to use something that was non-porous or varnished wood.  I had neither of these at this point.  I ran to my shop and got a giant ball of clay.  I used this as my mold base and just stuck the pins into it.  This entire process took me about 3.5 hours.

Not hot enough and not enough!

Due to my impatience I didn't let the Gelflex "moltenize" enough and this was my first pour.  It looked like I had cut up a ton of Gelflex but I guess not.  So I had to recut all of this and melt it again.

This fabulous device is a Ranger Melt Art.  Scrapbookers are genius!

My second melt was maxing out the container, was not enough, and again not hot enough.  Also, there was too much of the blue/large Gelflex resulting in lack of detail in my tiny military pins.  So at this point I scrapped it all recut just the delicate Gelflex (beige), took it into the kitchen and melted it in my toaster oven at 302 degrees for 2 minutes.  End result?

Success!!!

Once it cools I will add a picture of my final mold product.  Tomorrow I will attempt to use plaster of paris in small quantities and enamel resin for the first time.  Sweetness!

I also made an acrylic skin that turned out the wrong color, and a really dumb clay steelhead salmon/trout.  Back to the drawing board with these items.

While I was waiting for my Gelflex to melt I did some research and found two really cool artists:
Michael Rakowitz and Gina LeVay.

I also found some good articles on current military perception and OIF and OEF.